Behind the Scenes: Hilarious Google Searches

Behind the Scenes: Hilarious Google Searches

I’m pretty sure that I am on every single government watch list because of this job. Don’t get me wrong, it’s still my dream job and will forever be better than yours, but the things I look at on the internet have forever damned me. Everybody in the office has had at least one virus on their computer because of the ridiculous sites that we visit all in the name of “research.” I have compiled a list of the funniest, most ridiculous Google searches that I have legitimately had to type, all for the sake of paying my bills.

Apparently I Don’t Understand Celebrities

  • “Sexy Bruno Mars”
  • “Pauly Shore catch phrases”
  • “’Smokin’ catchphrase”
  • “When did ‘The Mask’ come out?”Behind the scenes
  • “Bert and Ernie” (twice)
  • “When was Sharon Stone popular?”
  • “Angela Landsbury”
  • “The Situation”
  • “Joe Biden sexy”
  • “Harrison Ford earring”

Or Rap Music…

  • “What does Waka Flocka Flame mean?”
  • “What does it mean to ‘be a dime’?”
  • “Ass titties ass ass and titties”
  • “Whatever happened to City High”
  • “Drake Espys Side Pieces”

Things I Search At The End Of A Long Day

  • “Stages of grief”
  • “What is the closest bar to me?”
  • “Things to do on a Monday afternoon”
  • “Rice Krispie treats”
  • “Someone who works at a pharmacy”

Because I’m A Sex Blogger

  • “What happens when a butt plug gets stuck?”
  • “What’s it called when you are sexually attracted to yourself?”
  • “What happens to your body after an orgasm”
  • “Dry blowjobs” (twice)
  • “What’s it like to get a dry blowjob?”
  • “What’s it like to give a dry blowjob?”

Who Writes About Getting High…

  • “Masturbating drug dealer”
  • “Sexual marijuana things”
  • “Shitload of pipes”
  • “Highest people on the internet”

Things That Not Even I Have An Explanation For

  • “Ingredients in soy sauce”
  • “Flamboyantly gay men”
  • “Glitter”
  • “Reading rainbow song”
  • “Things that are wet”
  • “Many men”
  • “Things that have tough to open packages”Behind the scenes
  • “We hope you enjoyed your stay”
  • “Sexy smoked meats”
  • “Asian masks” (twice)
  • “Humorous photo of a lighthouse in fog”
  • “Feeling left out”
  • “What’s it called when you are able to move gracefully?”
  • “Wheelbarrow”
  • “Stair chair”
  • “Genital shaped vegetables”
  • “Shady Halloween stores”
  • “Gummy bear song”
  • “What’s a double bed in a hotel?”
  • “Things women aren’t allowed to do”
  • “Retained placenta”

This is just one month of searching. I think maybe I’ll make this a regular thing, if only for the pure enjoyment of getting to relive all of these ridiculous moments.

 


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