If there are two things we love here at Stoned Media Group, it’s adult toys and getting high and using adult toys. Clearly, we are a fan of the irreverent here as well, so when we saw that the company Divine Interventions existed, we knew we would be instant friends.
For those of you who are unfamiliar with Divine Interventions, they are a company that specializes in high quality silicone dildos that are shaped in the likeness of religious figures. For those of you who think that this is too good to be true, guess again. Divine Interventions has been around for more than ten years now, and has established themselves as a forerunner in the niche and fetish adult market.
They offer everything from a dildo donning the face of Buddha named Budda’s Delight to a Baby Jesus Buttplug. On their website, you can also purchase dildos in the likeness of the Virgin Mary, The Diving Nun, and for those of you who prefer the dark side, the Grim Reaper and The Devil himself. For the men out there who want something that won’t go inside them, they even have a silicone bible that you can insert your penis into. If you’re not into the religious aspect of self pleasure (or pleasure with a partner), but want high quality silicone toys, they also offer non-denominational toys as well.
While we wished that we had sent us their entire line of products to try out, sadly they didn’t. But, they did send us arguably their most impressive dildo, the Jackhammer Jesus. The Jackhammer Jesus is impressive in both length and girth, measuring 7.5 inches high and 1.75 inches around. The Jackhammer Jesus is remarkably firm and sturdy for how big it is.
The end of the Jackhammer Jesus is shaped like the top of a crucifix, and because it is attached to a dildo, it is reminiscent of the hilt of a sword, which is actually pretty sexy when you consider the gripping and thrusting ability that comes with that sort of construction.
Starting on the crucifix and tapering down about halfway onto the actual insertable dildo is the figure of Jesus on the cross. This is perfect for either g spot or clitoral stimulation, depending on your anatomy and how far you insert it. The Divine Interventions website reminds you to insert feet first, and we have to say we back them up on that one.
The bottom half of the Jackhammer Jesus dildo is ribbed, and leads to a very impressive head. While the product is novelty, the website says that it is “designed to make you come”, and they are not lying. The ribbing coupled with the girth of the head is very well designed to evoke a vaginal orgasm with ease. The only downside to the Jackhammer Jesus is that the back of the dildo is flat and not ribbed, but provided you use it Jesus side up, you should have no problem hitting your g spot.
Divine Interventions ships domestically here in the United States and to 42 countries worldwide. You can get your dildos in a variety of colors and marbling, including purple, blue, red, black, steel, and even glow in the dark! Each piece is made to order with love and care. Divine Interventions suggests that you handle your dildo with love and care, and while it is dishwasher safe, you can also boil it for three minutes to sanitize it. We washed ours with antibacterial soap and water, and that worked just fine as well. While we think this should go without saying, for those of you who are new to the sex toy market, never use it with silicone based lubricants.
All in all, we love Divine Interventions. They are a great birthday, bachelor/bachelorette, or otherwise gag gift, sure, but they are also quality hand made dildos, which is something that is hard to find in the adult toy industry these days. The toys are all reasonably priced, ranging from $27 for the smaller toys to $65 for the Jackhammer Jesus. We recommend giving them a try, whether it be the religious versions or non-denominational we’re sure you’ll find something you like.